Many years ago when Daniel was a baby and I was washing dishes a nice looking Mercedes Benz pulled into our driveway and a lady came to our door to let us know she had Christmas presents for the kids. I did not answer the door but I heard her say why she was here and without thinking about it I heard myself shout NO! WE DON'T WANT THEM! She left quickly and I and my anger were left to a house of disappointed children who probably were wondering what they just missed and a frustrated wife who wondered why I should care where the presents come from as long as the kids get some. It had been a tough year financially. The normally abundant overtime at work was unexpectedly shut off completely and the discount tuition at the Christian school was unexpectedly replaced with full cost tuition both just in time for Christmas. As the payer of the bills, I found myself with enough money to pay the bills but not enough left to buy groceries and definitely not enough to buy Christmas presents. This was hard to take, I had a good job and it paid well but we had stretched our budget to the max and when things got tight it just snapped. I was already feeling bad about getting food from food pantries and had been arguing with Sandy about getting on the WIC program (Women with Infant Children) because to me it smacked of welfare and we were not that destitute. I can be blamed for being too proud here and probably I deserve that criticism but I didn't care and still don't. I think it is better to be too proud than not proud enough. Anyway sorry about the lost Christmas presents, they were no doubt the dream presents you all always wanted and never got. And to think they were just a few feet away in that shiny Mercedes Benz and mean old Dad had to chase them away. I think that was the year you all got second hand presents, but if I remember correctly they were not bad presents at all. Funny how a story I heard today triggered that memory and the emotion that went with it, enough to make me want to write about it.
PS in time I got a little second job and the school year ended and Christian school tuition went away never to return again. Life went back to normal and now all that is left are the memories of being poor for a season.
